Challenge Dubai - 13th pro - race poem

I came upon a desert land

Betrothed in oil and lots of sand

I trekked the globe to race a tri

The aim to swim and bike and fly.

Alas I thought I hadn’t done

The work required to have the fun.

(That comes later in the year

When one’s love handles disappear…)

Anyway I tried to swim,

It didn’t work, despite a Hymn.

I called on God but He said “Nooo

Ah’ve more important things tae do”.

My corpse washed up upon the shore,

A beat up athlete on deaths door

Ran up the beach to lots of claps

Then fell, in front of some hot chaps.

Twas time to mount the ‘zebratron’

And ride like twenty thousand men.

Alak I could not find the way

I took so long they’d gone to pray.

Ninety-one K of out-and-back

Time to launch the run attack!

I scampered off – regretted that

I felt as good as a cow pat.

The good ones always soldier on

I followed suit – it felt so long.

I’d had hopes of a better day

Perhaps next time I race in May!

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